Heart-Waters

A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.

 Luke 6:45

            We recently had an infestation of mosquitoes in our house.  For the life of us, we could not figure out why.  That is until a puddle about the size of large kitchen sink was discovered in our backyard.  The water was tepid, green and riddled with those little aforementioned blood thirsty warriors! Once we cleared out the water, viol-la! Problem solved.  

“Out of the mouth the heart speaks”.  Words spring forth from the waters within our heart.  Well if that’s true (and I believe it is because Jesus, who is fully God, all good, King over creation and the smartest man who ever lived said it is), then what has been coming out of my mouth indicates there are some infected, “Mosquito-ridden", places in my heart.  At times I can be cynical, sarcastic, or just downright dismissive with my words; which, according to scripture, suggest a contemptuous heart.  OUCH!  Could that be true?  Contempt is “studied anger”.  Do I really study anger? Well, anger is studied when I ruminate on an offence and do not seek healing or restoration in it.  Where my heart hurts, it will hurt others.  I guess I do study anger.  So when I hear myself using language that dismisses or jabs, even when I’m leading out with humor, the question I’m learning to ask is, “What’s behind this?” I need to chase down the source!

            The other day I said to a friend something that, on the surface, seemed neutral, but it was flavored with frustration and anger. As I chased it down, what was really going on was that I was disappointed about something and I felt disregarded.  I was expecting one thing (regard), and, from my perspective, got another (dismissal).  So I returned the favor.   I dismissed her with my words.  That’s what you do when you’re hurt – right?  Ha!  See, there’s more sarcasm…oh my, this is a deep source? 

            Words are powerful!  They bring life or death because they stem from the life or death within us.   Sometimes words reflect a fresh water spring, refreshing the soul of another.  Sometimes they reflect the stagnate waters in the street, breeding bacteria and disease.    What do my words say about my heart?   If I am to be made new in Christ then I must give him access to my “heart-waters”.  He will heal the broken places.  He will make the tepid waters new.  Yet, as I consider what it feels like to give him access to my heart – the vulnerability causes me once again to want to protect and close myself off.  This battle is fierce!  It all goes back to who I am trusting; Jesus, who is all good, King of creation, completely brilliant, is the one who loves me.  I can trust him to be good and wise while he heals the broken and hurt places.  As I do, my “heart-waters” clear and what springs forth are words of refreshment and life.

Oh God, there is work to be done!  I will be still.  I will wait and partner with you in this “clean-up” job.  Forgive me for allowing these stagnated waters to remain in me.  Forgive me for the way in which I hurt your beloved as a result.  Thank you for being the One who is all good, King over creation, the smartest man who ever lived and loving me.