When
I was a young teenager I spent a short time dealing with Anorexia. Over time I became quite weak. I entered high school weighing a whopping 83
pounds. Now one would think that food is
the logical option at this point but it took me a while to be convinced of its
benefits. At the time, I like the "advantages" of starving myself. I actually found a sense of identity in them. But with some time and a little help I began to eat again and found life was better when I nourished my body.
If life is found in the pause instead of the sprint ( as was said in the last post) I wonder if we might at times starve our soul like some starve their bodies. It seems that to live the good life means going 100 mph to fit every "enriching activity" in to the day. By the end of the day, instead of sharing a meal we simply pass out at the table. It is at this point that "food" is the logical option. As much as our bodies were made to be nourished by a hearty meal so was our soul. “God prepares a table before us” and we are invited to “taste and see that the Lord is good.” ...To "feast" on Jesus, who is the broken bread and poured out wine (Ps 23 & 34; Luke 22)
So how
does one feast on God and nourish the soul instead of doing a face-plant at the table? It begins the same way it did
for me as I dealt with anorexia. I had
to first realize I was starving myself and it was doing harm. The ear-marks for it were listless-ness, foggy
thinking, and a sense of isolation.
At the risk of seemingly adding to the to-do list I will say this: If your time with God is close to nil, you are starving your soul and doing harm. This is not a guilt trip and by the end I think you will find it is also not another item to add to your to-do list. This is just me trying to keep it real...you see, our soul has similar alarms as our body does. I am sure I’m not the only one who may feel spiritually “listless” once -in-a-while. Sometimes, the thought of investing in anything spiritual sounds exhausting so I don’t. Have you ever wanted to “be more spiritual” but can’t seem to find any focus? Ever feel like your head is about to explode if you don’t get some space from things? But you cant get space because your schedule is so crowded running from one thing to the next you barely have time to breath. It’s like there’s this wonderful land out there and occasionally you catch a glimpse of it through the fog, but something keeps it veiled and just out of reach. you'd like to find it but these things that sound-off in our soul...this inward chaos? We are held captive by them.... and we begin to wonder if this far-off wonderland is just an illusion which means this is as good as life gets.
Sound
familiar? STOP. Stop the rat-race that has befriended you and
pause. Breathe in and breathe out….literally! Those things that you're doing that identify you?...They don't make you who you are, God does. So wait quietly for Him to come near…He will…don’t you worry. It is in the pause that we feast on God's love so find ways to encounter Him.At the risk of seemingly adding to the to-do list I will say this: If your time with God is close to nil, you are starving your soul and doing harm. This is not a guilt trip and by the end I think you will find it is also not another item to add to your to-do list. This is just me trying to keep it real...you see, our soul has similar alarms as our body does. I am sure I’m not the only one who may feel spiritually “listless” once -in-a-while. Sometimes, the thought of investing in anything spiritual sounds exhausting so I don’t. Have you ever wanted to “be more spiritual” but can’t seem to find any focus? Ever feel like your head is about to explode if you don’t get some space from things? But you cant get space because your schedule is so crowded running from one thing to the next you barely have time to breath. It’s like there’s this wonderful land out there and occasionally you catch a glimpse of it through the fog, but something keeps it veiled and just out of reach. you'd like to find it but these things that sound-off in our soul...this inward chaos? We are held captive by them.... and we begin to wonder if this far-off wonderland is just an illusion which means this is as good as life gets.
If you love nature then go outside. Look for God’s whisper
in the bird song or sunrise, if you love books, find one and read it. Since it is God you are seeking I suggest
finding one that speaks well of Him, like the Bible, or one written by someone
who’s encountered him and can share it. Do you love music? Then turn on the worship
and let it fill the room. If you don't think you have time, you're wrong. I will be that bold to assure you that the One who holds time in his hands has as His deepest desire to share time with you. So take five, take ten, or take a whole day if you can. ...Just come, come and feast...
“If you are starving and can find nothing to satisfy your hunger, then come. Come, and you will be filled.” Jeanne Guyon
This is so good, Michelle. As one who also did some time as an anorexic, I see the clear connection between starving our bodies and starving our souls. Thank you for writing so honestly!
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