Making Room

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me. – Rev. 3:20 (NIV)

Our Garage is a mess…There are all kinds of things in there, luggage that needs to go up into the rafters, some of the kids old things they’d like to save are scattered throughout the space, bikes, my canning supplies are spread out for the summer,  there are tools and tool boxes.   It’s all important stuff, but the mess prevents me from putting in there the one thing a garage was designed for – my car! What I want in there is my car.  As I was in conversation with a friend this week it dawned on me how well this depicts my inner life with Christ.

There is a garage in me that needs cleaning at times.  I can clutter my heart space with many things and crowd God right out.  There are a lot of reasons I do this, really.  I hang on to things that should get stored up in the rafters but I don’t really want to do the work of getting them up there.  I hang on to things that I think down the road will be beneficial but I don’t really spend the time investing in them to actually make it so.  There are things that really ought to be thrown away but, in a strange and broken way; I rather enjoy the comfort of having them around.  Sometimes I just don’t want to feel the loss of letting something go.

The problem is that, while it may be easier to neglect my heart-garage, it prevents me from having within me what I was designed for – God!  All the boxes of treasured items get in the way.  How can He fit when the space has been filled with so many other things?  I need to make room for Him.  I neglect my heart-garage because cleaning can be so overwhelming.  Just like with a real garage, I say things like, “What do I do with this?  It’s too messy and there’s so much stuff.  Don’t open the door to the street its embarrassing!"  Then I wonder if the venture is even possible.  Well it is... and it is worth the work!

The truth is, if I really desire for Christ to dwell in me, I have to deal with the things that keep him out.  The next few blog posts will deal with just that. It's interesting that Revelation 3:20 was an invitation to the religious to let Christ in.  There's a challenge for us!

Lord, I confess my cluttered heart.  Help me open the door to you and show me the things that have taken up space and keep your presence from being fully realized. Please dwell in me as you see fit.  I am yours. 

Heart-Waters

A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.

 Luke 6:45

            We recently had an infestation of mosquitoes in our house.  For the life of us, we could not figure out why.  That is until a puddle about the size of large kitchen sink was discovered in our backyard.  The water was tepid, green and riddled with those little aforementioned blood thirsty warriors! Once we cleared out the water, viol-la! Problem solved.  

“Out of the mouth the heart speaks”.  Words spring forth from the waters within our heart.  Well if that’s true (and I believe it is because Jesus, who is fully God, all good, King over creation and the smartest man who ever lived said it is), then what has been coming out of my mouth indicates there are some infected, “Mosquito-ridden", places in my heart.  At times I can be cynical, sarcastic, or just downright dismissive with my words; which, according to scripture, suggest a contemptuous heart.  OUCH!  Could that be true?  Contempt is “studied anger”.  Do I really study anger? Well, anger is studied when I ruminate on an offence and do not seek healing or restoration in it.  Where my heart hurts, it will hurt others.  I guess I do study anger.  So when I hear myself using language that dismisses or jabs, even when I’m leading out with humor, the question I’m learning to ask is, “What’s behind this?” I need to chase down the source!

            The other day I said to a friend something that, on the surface, seemed neutral, but it was flavored with frustration and anger. As I chased it down, what was really going on was that I was disappointed about something and I felt disregarded.  I was expecting one thing (regard), and, from my perspective, got another (dismissal).  So I returned the favor.   I dismissed her with my words.  That’s what you do when you’re hurt – right?  Ha!  See, there’s more sarcasm…oh my, this is a deep source? 

            Words are powerful!  They bring life or death because they stem from the life or death within us.   Sometimes words reflect a fresh water spring, refreshing the soul of another.  Sometimes they reflect the stagnate waters in the street, breeding bacteria and disease.    What do my words say about my heart?   If I am to be made new in Christ then I must give him access to my “heart-waters”.  He will heal the broken places.  He will make the tepid waters new.  Yet, as I consider what it feels like to give him access to my heart – the vulnerability causes me once again to want to protect and close myself off.  This battle is fierce!  It all goes back to who I am trusting; Jesus, who is all good, King of creation, completely brilliant, is the one who loves me.  I can trust him to be good and wise while he heals the broken and hurt places.  As I do, my “heart-waters” clear and what springs forth are words of refreshment and life.

Oh God, there is work to be done!  I will be still.  I will wait and partner with you in this “clean-up” job.  Forgive me for allowing these stagnated waters to remain in me.  Forgive me for the way in which I hurt your beloved as a result.  Thank you for being the One who is all good, King over creation, the smartest man who ever lived and loving me.

In His Name

“Where two or three are gathered in his name God is there.  He is not silent nor is he inactive…The kingdom of God is here.”

While I know this is a conglomeration of various scripture passages it was also spoken by a friend at church today.  His words came with such authority that they seemed to be from God himself.  It was a reminder to his body that He is here, working, living and active!  Where two or three are gathered in his name…, hmm, that doesn't mean simply where two or three are gathered but instead gathered in his name.  What does that mean, “gathered in His name”?  Does it mean only within the four walls of a church?  Does it mean so long as Jesus' name is acknowledged and spoken?  Does it mean among a group of people who share the same doctrinal beliefs?  I don’t think so.  Yet, as much as these ideas seem a little narrow or “off”, they may inform our thoughts more than we realize.

Sadly, the phrase has dulled for me over the years.  It has lost some of its meaning and at times taken some of the above characteristics.  Based on the council of Scripture, In His name means under the Lordship of… or with collective agreement of heart, mind, and soul using all of our strength, we turn and orient toward YAHWEH, God of Israel and God of US!  As we turn and align our life with His, things happen.  “God is there”.  He speaks as we become ready to listen.  As we are led by His Spirit, He governs and lead us towards truth, His truth, and as we follow, our attitude and heart orientation  changes from one of resistance to open handed acceptance.  We surrender.  In our surrender we are able to see His activity and the kingdom of God becomes evident here, in the present place, with this present group of people.  He frees us to live better and love better.  In doing so, the kingdom of God becomes all the more present and active…..He speaks and He is active in and through us as we gather In His name. 

“For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them." - Matthew 18:20

“….Well said, teacher,” the man replied. “You are right in saying that God is one and there is no other but him. To love him with all your heart, with all your understanding and with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself is more important than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.” When Jesus saw that he had answered wisely, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” And from then on no one dared ask him any more questions. - Mark 12:28-34

All of this leaves me pondering a few questions…

Do I gather “in His name”? 

If I believe I am what is the evidence?

How am I or others changed as a result?

conversation is good! So leave your comments in the comment box if you feel so inclined :) 

Shh...

“ Be still and know that I am God.” – Ps 46:10

            Our family has a tradition of spending Thanksgiving in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  My grandparents built a cabin there in 1974.  Now shared by many aunts, uncles and cousins it has become a kingdom of retreat.  One of my favorite pastimes is to walk through the rustic roads and enjoy the beauty of cabins nestled among golden oak trees, Manzanita, and sugar pines.  At times, squirrels and other animals come out to take a peek then scurry back to their homes.  All seem to greet a wandering partaker with welcome delight.

While I am talkative by nature, I've found that too much conversation diminishes a walk like this.  Words are best peppered conservatively along the way, allowing opportunity for the birdsong in the tree or the crackling of nature’s fallen extensions within the canopy above to be acknowledged and respected.  The tiny footsteps of a squirrel might hearken a glance back in that direction while my eyes follow its tail up a sunlit tree.  On rarer occasion, a deer will pose its beauty and for a heartbeat or two our eyes meet.  Hush...breathing too deep may signal its departure.  Wait, pause, partake.  For soon, this moment will be gone.

What if I took this sacred wandering practice into the more mundane; slowing down the inner highway of my heart to hear and take notice of God’s Kingdom?  Would I hear the tiny voice-cries of the walking wounded that go unnoticed when I am hurried?  Would I be more likely to respect and acknowledge God’s hand at work as he “prunes” the weakened extensions of my own heart or the heart of another?  Would kind respect be exchanged in a shared glance during the wait at a traffic light?  What is it like to walk down the rustic path of God’s everyday-kingdom with stillness? Ever looking. Ever noticing. This moment, right here, is all there is.  Yesterday is gone and tomorrow has not come.  It is here in the present that Finite-human encounters Infinite-God.  Divine opportunities await our response; opportunities that, in their exhale, bring life. “Be still and know that I am God.”  This is his invitation to us, His Beloved.  Be still, take note, and walk in quiet wonder.  His Majesty is at work.

Prayer: Oh Father, I confess that I am often too hurried to notice your hand at work or your beauty displayed in and around me.  I want to be different.  Help me be present with you.  Show me how to walk with stillness in your Kingdom, partake in its blessings and in Your name bless others ~ Amen.

It Rained Today

“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.”   Acts 3:19

It rained today and I couldn’t help but take note of its disruptive nature.   The sidewalk darkened, the flowers bent low under the weight of collecting waters.  Earthy droplets sprang from the ground dancing in the showers.  Just as quickly as the clouds came, they dried their tears and hovered in quiet relief.  All was still.  Nothing heard but the drip drop reminder of sudden weeping.  In silence a light broke through. The sun displayed its splendor and this tiny piece of sodden creation was refreshed.  Sunlight glistened in the face of a daisy and adorned the cheek of a rose.   The muck of the mundane was once again washed away by the storm and revived beneath the sun.

                In a similar way, there is a storm that rises within the soul of each of us.  It is graced with the Divine.   In its surge and fury it betrays our hidden places and lays bare our brokenness.  As we lie there bending low in our sodden state, words escaping our defenses, He kneels along side in the mud and the mire that purged from the recent torrent.  A light shines forth warming our naked soul.  We are caressed by His love as the SON ushers in His splendor.  

                That is the beauty of a storm. Intuitively I run away , hoping to ward off it's disruption, but I am learning to appreciate its advances and lean into it.  There are places within me that otherwise remain unacknowledged, untouched and unhealed were it not for a storm or two to pry the unseen to the surface.    Once the storm has done its work I bring my heart’s turned up soil into the fellowship of the Trinity - where God sits for the awaited visit.  Jealousy, anger, hurt, fear and disappointments are all there to be seen by Him.  Somewhere in my kneeling, Jesus comes and changes me. The Holy Spirit bears witness in hovering presence, and I am again revived, resting beneath the shadow of His Spirit and beside the risen Son.

Prayer: Oh Lord, help me embrace the storms.  Holy Spirit rain down.  Search me, Oh God and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Our God-Call

Purpose is a funny thing.  We were created to have purpose -  to be a part of something bigger than ourselves - To accomplish something great for the sake of others and to stand in awe of something even greater. (John 14:12)  That is the God-signature in all of us.  That is what our God-imaged soul strains and cries out for.   Without it, our life is small and unrealized. (Matt 25:15-30)  This does not mean WE are to be great. It means that partnering with the King of kings to accomplish his good reign "on earth as it is in heaven" is a fierce calling and counter intuitive journey. (Mark 8:35)  It will take our breath away, sometimes in awe, sometimes in excitement and sometimes in fear and sorrow. To live this way means to die to everything familiar, and to surrender the things we hold most dear, - it is an invitation to release the past, present and future into the hands of something or someone other than ourselves;  someone greater than us.  Someone who loves best, sees completely all time and space, who holds all things within his grasp, and someone who is at work on our behalf.  This is our creator God.  He is our suffering, conquering redeemer, he is our Abba; he is our intimate soul companion.  And he can be trusted entirely with this counter-intuitive life journey.  He will hem us in behind and before, (Isa 52:12) he is sitting at the place of reckoning interceding for us at this moment. (Hebrews 7:24-25) He is the bread and wine that will nourish our souls along this wilderness way (John 6:32-33).  And as we seek to orient our life in His direction, fully consecrating ourselves to His purposes, He will surprise us with this love, (Zeph 3:17) He will redeem us with his miraculous soul-touch (Mark 5:24-34), He will revive us with His heart-passion (Ps 37:4), and he will receive us to himself in all grace and mercy.  This is our hope. This is our Joy.  This is our life.


"Not until we have become humble and teachable, standing in awe of God's holiness and sovereignty, acknowledging our own  littleness, distrusting our own thoughts, and willing to have our minds turned upside down can divine wisdom become ours." - J.I. Packer

Staying in the Fire

              

 I remember a few years ago I came to a place where life just wasn't  working the way I would like it to.  Something seemed to elude me; though I was not sure what.  I knew in my head somehow God was the answer but it seemed so far off and confusing.  However, I could not deny the fact that God was inviting me to a new place; a place that would give Him deeper access to my heart and life so I agreed to go.  I did not fully know at that point what I was doing.   I suppose that’s a good thing because had I known the purifying fire that would ensue I’m sure I would have run!   There are a few things I know about fire.  It’s hot, it’s not easy to control, it burns and consumes, and it purifies.  Well that’s how God seems to work in me – just like a fire.  Maybe He works that way in you too.

When we give Him access, desiring a deeper life with him it means opening ourselves up more to His way.  When circumstances come up that are hard we choose not to run but instead work through them and boy, doesn't conflict turn the fire up?  Releasing control over the situation is hard! There’s no working to “fix” it or manipulating it to control the outcome.  When we let God determine the outcome, instead of working to control it we work to stay yielded to His heart in it.  Often in relinquishing those things, our hearts cry out on behalf of our self or someone else, “Wait it’s not fair!” or “Stop! It’s getting too hot!”  But God, in His infinite wisdom and goodness, allows the fire to continue and in so doing, it burns, consuming the impurities within us, forcing some of them to the surface.   Those are the things He wants.  Those are the things he sees and says, “Hey, can I have that?”  Those are the things we can surrender to Him knowing that when we do He is making us more like Jesus.     As we give God deeper access to our heart and life we are in the fire together.  It’s hot and often out of control.  Staying in it causes our life to be consumed.  But…somewhere in the ashes we find HIM, the One who loves us and never loses sight of His beloved.  So stay where it’s hot.  Let God work.  The purifying of the fire allows us to know His joy and reflect Him more.  For every part of our life that was lost God gives us His in return.  And His life is so much better!

“Anyone who holds on to life just as it is destroys that life.  But if you let it go, reckless in your love, you’ll have it forever, real and eternal.” - Jesus