Slow-Chewing Mornings - a conversation about Christian meditation

Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long. How sweet are your words to my taste,  sweeter than honey to my mouth! – Psalm 119:97,103

The other morning as I sleepily made my way to the coffee maker, for whatever reason, something smelled just like my grandparent’s kitchen did when I was growing up.  Instantly I was transported into memories of waking up in their small valley ranch home where the mornings were warm and quiet and the aroma of  instant coffee shared the air with the newly-cut alfalfa next door.  I could picture my grandpa reading the newspaper in the kitchen next to their old formica table, and grandma standing at the stove-top where eggs were usually sizzling. She was always sure to tell my brother and I to fill up our belly and clean our plate.  I loved mornings like that.  They were grace-rhythmed, slow-chewing mornings.

Isn’t it funny how one whiff of the familiar can bring a person right back to something otherwise long forgotten?  As I stood 40+ years later in my own kitchen, I remembered things like the little wooden, pig-shaped plaque that hung above my grandma’s stove with the words, “Pigs is Pigs”.  I remember many laughs around that plaque and how it never came off the wall.  I recalled one of my grandfather’s more common mantras: “Michellie, just remember you don’t have to get clean to take a bath.”  That was his way of reminding us that God’s love was unconditional and we come best when we come to him just as we are. They are words that continue to shape me, even to this day.  That kitchen was a place where we took in some of the nutrients of living. 

I was recently asked why I put such an emphasis on meditative prayer.  My answer will be similar to these memories.  But before I go on, a brief clarification might be helpful.  Christian Meditative Prayer always has as its foundation the Word of God and worship.  It is not a random reaching for nirvana nor is it empty.  Much like the slow-chewing mornings shared in my grandparent’s kitchen, in meditation we sit with God and chew on his word.  We let it be digested for what it is, taking in its nutrients in shared community with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, until we are full.  It is where God’s Living Word mediates his written word.   Things otherwise long-forgotten, are recalled as the Spirit wafts what has, over time and careful thought, been made familiar. His Truth moves from mind to heart as God's love-mantra is remembered in quiet rumination...We are "filled up"... shaped by his word.

While I am genuinely surprised at the concern in our current western church culture around meditation, I understand it.  There are many spiritual cultures seeking to find deeper understandings about gods and humanity.  There are many that claim meditation as one of their primary modes of prayer, but they lack the foundation of the One True God and His written and Living word.   Scripture mentions meditation 20 times, so let’s not relinquish the term, and let's not assume it means the same in every circle.  Incorrect labeling can cause confusion and we will be tempted to reject it altogether.  It will starve the soul just like skipping those meals in my grandparents kitchen would have starved my body.  If we want to get to know God we will spend time slow-chewing with him.  We will read what he has to say, we will look close at each word, we will give it slow-chewing, prayerful time so that it becomes familiar and integrated.  

There is a video recently produced by Pandora Jewelry.  It shows children from the ages of 3-9 years old, blindfolded and guided towards a group of mothers. 

Click here for video

One by one they made their way through the group. Searching expectantly, for what would be familiar to them – hands, hair, face; each eventually found the one they knew as mom.  It was not only powerful, it was beautiful!  Those blindfolded children reminded me of seasons in my life when God seemed to disappear – The times when faith and truth are identified by what has been discovered in past nearness and carried in memory.  That is the gift cultivated through meditation - God becomes familiar.  And it happens as we search expectantly His Word, forging a God-mantra, drawing near, chewing slowly, being nourished.  So that even when all goes dark we are still finding the one we know as God.

GOOD Friday

 Jesus replied, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.  Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

He then began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and after three days rise again. He spoke plainly about this, and Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. But when Jesus turned and looked at his disciples, he rebuked Peter. 'Get behind me, Satan!"'He said.  'You do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns'" - John 12:23-25

Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and

follow me.  For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. -  Mark 8:31-33

           Today is “good” Friday.  GOOD.  I wonder if the disciples would have called it good.  I wonder if they would have called it something different, like “unjust” Friday, or “disillusioned” Friday.  Maybe “Dark” Friday would have seemed fitting.  Yet it has come to be known as “Good Friday”, and while on the surface it does not make a whole lot of sense, upon a deeper look it does.

            It is a day that proclaims God's purpose of loving and redeeming the world through the cross of Jesus Christ. It is a day that is good because God was drawing the world to himself in Christ. As seen in John's gospel, particularly, God was in control. He was not making the best of a bad situation.  He was actually working out HIS intention for the world — winning salvation for all people.  He was making a way for you and I to be with him, and not just in Heaven when we die. He was also making a way for us to be in close proximity (abide) with him now!  Right here on this dusty place called earth, God drew near through Jesus and he still draws near because of the cross and resurrection of Christ. 

            But has Good Friday become lost in the clamor of Easter?  Sometimes a chocolate egg sounds a whole lot better than a Lenten fast.  And 350,000 watts of sacred cantata vibration is much more alluring than the clash of hammer and nail upon that which we hold sacred.  Oh how often I want the resurrection without the cross.  I don’t want to suffer, and often don’t want to be reminded of it.  I don’t think I am alone.  Over the past few days many Easter ads from well-meaning churches have been smattered on Facebook and websites.  “Come to our church on Easter Sunday!  We will entertain you with flashy music, our pastor will wow you with his inspirational sermon, and our members will blow you away with their hospitality.”  …somewhere in there is a story about the crucified, resurrected Jesus. 

            I’ve sang in a fair share of Easter programs where melodically I sang resurrection words externally, all the while internally I was asking God, “Why don’t I feel resurrected?  Where’s the life-abundant you promised?”   I comforted my personal inquisition with a quick, “Oh well, maybe next year.”  But next year would come with the same empty promises.  I desperately wanted something more than I was experiencing.  I felt like a big, fat fake...and I desperately wanted real life.   

            This morning I over heard a television news story talking about life after death. (I have no idea of its contents because I’ve been typing this.) The only phrase I heard was “two people, grateful for death, now living.”  How perfect for this post!

          All those Easters  I longed for life but skipped the cross.  I was compelled to protect what felt sacred – they were good things!  Health, financial security, relationships, ....  But resurrected life comes after death.  We must move through the surrender - into the unchosen sacrifices of hopes, dreams and aspirations - in order to live free.  We are not alone when we cry out in naked forsaken-ness.  The One who hung on a cross shares the sorrow and can be trusted with our pain.  We “suffer for a while but joy comes in the morning.”  A kernel of wheat must fall to the ground and die before it can serve its intended purpose and birth more life.  And it was not until I embraced the difficult pieces of my story, and laid to rest my ‘sacred-somethings’ that life started to showed up.  It has been through a path that includes disillusionment, frustration, and dark nights of the soul that has lead to a resurrection.  It often felt unjust.  Like Peter, I wanted (and sometimes still do) to rebuke Jesus for suggesting the path to real life means letting mine go.  And while I cannot drink the cup from which Christ drank (Matt 20:22), if I want to encounter his life, there is a cross involved - Jesus’ and mine.   Jesus unjustly hung on a cross for the sake of a restored relationship between God and us..   He rose again, to shatter the power of death and make right-now, real, eternal life possible.  Good Friday reminds me that life is found in “taking up my cross daily to follow him” …. Jesus’ resurrected life will lift a dead soul from the grave.  In the news caster’s words, we can be grateful for death because through it, we can now live.  

"Breate" - Christian Spiritual Contemplation

Contemplation:

1.     The action of looking thoughtfully at, or giving careful thought to, something for a period of time.

• “He made his decision after many hours of contemplation.”  "She contemplated the beauty of the meadow.”
• Synonyms: examination, inspection, observation, survey, study, scrutiny, rumination, reflection, introspection, consideration.

 Contemplation can be described as the steady gaze of the soul upon God, where we seek to be prayerfully present with Him. It is where we learn to place ourselves before God and become attentive to His voice. It is less about petitioning the throne of a distant God and more about abiding with the One who is near. (John 15)

Three Tales About Breathing;

               I remember the first time I ever stepped into a classroom to substitute teach.  I stood outside the door knowing that just beyond that point were a couple dozen second-graders full of energy and attitude.  For the next seven hours it was up to me to manage their behavior, keep them on schedule, and hopefully teach them something!  I was a nervous wreck!  How could mini people hold such power?  I took a few deep breaths to gather my thoughts and proceeded through the door. It's funny how breath becomes short when something overwhelms us...

..... As an infant, our son sometimes came down with a horrible cough that would prevent him from breathing easily.  Some called it “the croup”.  I remember one night it was especially bad and we called the doctor (who was not all that thrilled to be awakened at 1 am, but we were desperate).  His advice was to keep our son calm to help him inhale the steamy air.  It meant sitting with him in our tiny little bathroom with the shower running, holding him, and singing a song or two for comfort... while he did his best to simply breathe.  The more still he sat, the better his breathing.  Thankfully it worked.   If you've ever been with someone who is having difficulty breathing you know it can be scary and quickly become life-threatening! ...

 ....Recently my friend’s daughter was hospitalized with RSV which is a virus that affects the lungs and breathing passages. The doctor told her parents that the best way to help her recover was to show her how to inhale deeply, letting the whole lung fill up and function the way it was meant to.   Breathing is one of those thing we simply must do.  We cannot function if we do not breathe.  So where am I going with all this talk about breathing when the subject is contemplation?  Contemplation helps us recover from a breathless life.  

In a similar way to my son and our friends daughter, you and I live with spiritual viruses that infect our spiritual breathing capacity.  Life tensions rise daily in the form of a crammed schedule, an angry boss, fussy children, personal frustrations - I could go on, but surely you get the picture.  These are the joy-stealers, the life-suckers, and if we are not careful, they will eclipse our view of God entirely. Sometimes we need to let our soul "breathe".

            As a voice coach I would tell students to breathe in a similar manner as the doctors mentioned above.   It is important for a singer to avoid forced breathing where the breath is gasped, tense, and shallow.  Inhaling correctly allows the singer to bring the full expression of the phrase to life.  Quiet, thoughtful, listening prayer – contemplative prayer – is like breathing.  We pause to "breathe in" the breath of God, deep and free, which in turn allows us to bring a fuller expression of Him to others through our own holy life-song.  
It happens as we become still, intentioning our thoughts his direction, letting all the things that steal our breath to be acknowledged and surrendered to God.  This “life-breath” fills us to capacity, allowing us to function the way we were meant to function.  Joy and life are restored.  Energy come back, fresh perspectives emerge – ones that reflect the benevolent, grace-filled nature of GOD.  Yes, pausing to exhale and inhale is a good thing!

There are many well-meaning Christian advisers who misinform the broader Christian community about "contemplation" saying it is about emptying one's mind into nothing... and to stay far away from it all.  Well, I don't know if an empty mind is even possible! Our minds were never meant to be void. But we must be careful in this practice to consider our ability to distinguish God's voice from others, or even our own.  Richard Foster offers these check points to guage if this a practice of prayer one might be ready for. 1. "Am I becoming less afraid of being known and owned by God?" 2. "Is prayer developing in me as a welcomed discipline?" 3. is it becoming easier for me to receive constructive criticsm?" 4. "Am I learning to move beyond personal offense and freely forgive those who have wronged me?"  These are markers for growth that help us distinguish our heart posture.  There are supernatural forces at play that are not Divine that will prey upon our unsurrenered soul (1 Pet 5:8)  But as we surrender to the above, we discover the God is indeed greater than he that is in the world! ((1 John 4:4)

Sadly, following the advice to stay away from thoughtful, Christ-centered, contemplation altogether, suffocates our soul.  Christian contemplation is not about emptying our minds into nothing-ness.  (A quick dictionary search will dispel that.)  But it is about becoming still, emptying ourselves of the tensions that rise, and letting go of thoughts that eclipse God. It has as it's goal union with God (John 15:4,5,11; 17:21). Once we have let go of what clutters our mind into chaos, we can pause and take notice of whatever is pure, true, honorable, lovely, excellent or of good repute. (Phil 4:8)  God, un-eclipsed, will calm us with his presence, in his arms we will hear his song, we will remember He is God and we are not...and we will once again, breathe. (Ps 46:10).

How about you?  Does your soul feel breathless?  Is your mind cluttered? Are your actions agitated and desperate, like someone scrambling for air?

If so, stop.  Be still.  Let yourself fall into quiet contemplation before the One who loves you deeply.  Steady your gaze on Him. He is the one who gave Adam his first life-breath, and He will do the same for you.

Lost In Translation

Recently I had the opportunity to visit London.  It is one of my favorite cities. I enjoy visiting a place with such rich history, while still having the advantage of shared language.  In my opinion, that's a win-win! However not all words mean the same thing. Take for instance the word "jumper". In the USA, a jumper is a shoulder-to-thigh girl's dress, whereas in the UK a jumper is a knitted garment worn over a shirt or tee by either gender.  

Leaving from Victoria Station to 
another, I noticed this sign. Now if you are an American you will know that the word "tooting" likely has a different meaning than is meant for this sign...and that's all I am going to say about that.  

However, it causes me to think about the way a misunderstanding can arise when the language being used is not universally understood by all parties. Some of these misunderstandings are having a profound impact on Christian thought and community.   Words like meditate or contemplate seem to evoke peace in one person, while at the same time striking alarm in another.   Phrases like silence and solitude may sound attractive to one but repel someone else.  So what is my point?  These are phrases that seem to be dividing the body of Christ more than unifying it.  And frankly, I think we have more in common than we realize, but sometimes what we say gets lost in translation.

I've been asked if I practice contemplation or meditation.  And while the question does not surprise me, it is clear by the way the question is asked, that we might not share the same definition of the word, so I usually asked for clarity.  "Well, do you pray using a candle or try to empty your mind?" Usually comes their concerned response.

"I suppose sometimes I enjoy the beauty of a candle when I am thinking on Christ.  It reminds me that He is the light of the world (John 1), but I don't use a candle every time I pray.  And sometimes I ruminate on a portion of scripture and 'chew' on it a bit longer because it helps me remember his truth and make it real in me (James 1:23).

Am I searching for a stage of Nirvana in doing such things...nope.  Not one bit. Have I crossed over to Zen Buddhism? Not unless the Levites did when they were keeping the Lamp-stands lit in the Tabernacle, or unless David did when he opened up his great songs of worship with a call to 'meditate on this day and night'."   

Usually the next question is something like, "What about this whole silence and solitude thing?"  I guess after a busy or difficult day, week, month or year, silence and solitude offers a welcomed rest.  In it, we can quiet the voices that have come at us all day long, everyday. Its a chance to come away with God and just hear His voice. In that regard I enjoy being alone in silence, and I am willing to guess that many of us do, I know Jesus and the disciples did (Matt 14, Luke 6 & 9)!


But these questions are asked for good reason.  I am grateful for the inquiry because it means their meaning is not being assumed.  The fact is, these words have become confusing, and without realizing it we've inserted our own definition - drawing from it our own conclusion. We do this often, don't we? We almost can't help it. Words mean something to us and they should... but sometimes I assume I know the meaning, or the story, behind the words when in reality what I really need is a little clarification.
There was a short Youtube video that went viral not very long ago.  It showed two young children discussing whether it was "Sprinkowen or wainin'" outside.  Can I say it is absolutely adorable?!

Here's the link.

Did you watch it?  Oh I hope so!  It is just so ridiculously cute! Each child meant the same thing, but were using different words. An argument ensued, at which point near the end, one struck out and "hurt the heart" of the other.  This video has a lot to say about the way in which we might communicate and assume meaning.  It's worth some thought....sometimes we hurt the heart of another with our commendable concern, but quickened judgments.  I can only wonder if one of these cuties had asked, "What do you mean?"  if the whole problem would have been avoided, and I wonder the same thing about the church.

The next few blog posts will be dedicated to just such words...words where we may have heard, "Sprinkowen" and have no idea that what they really meant was "wainin".   So be sure to come back and take a peek to see how the discussion is going. Let's keep from getting things lost in translation.  If you have ideas or questions, an anonymous response can be added to the comment column below.  

All praise to HIM, that is God - Father, Son and Holy Spirit, who is in all things, above all things and before all things!  

But To As Many of These...

As I sit and write today, morning has yet to wake up and the fog once again relentlessly blankets any efforts the sun might make to come along and brighten the day.  But don’t worry this is not going to be a gloomy post.  It may however be a challenging one.  At least I know it is for me…deeply challenging.  I’ve been reading the passage of scripture found in Matthew 25 where Jesus talks about the sheep and the goats.  Here is an excerpt, but the whole of it is very important.

 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. for I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you have me something to drink, I was a stranger, and you invited me in, I needed clothes, and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me'"  (Matt 25:34-36)

In a recent Bible study I learned of a survey taken by people of 'comfortable means' It included those who are on government assistance programs, the typical middle class family, and those who live in fairly posh environments.  Needless to say, the demographics were broad.   The purpose of the study was to gain insight on how people interact and care for each other within a society.  One of the things they discovered was that most are more likely to love people as a whole, but LESS likely to love the individual.  The statement piqued my interest.   In other words, they (we) like the idea of love but not its reality.  Instead we tend to hold people at arms-length.  The survey results so intrigued me that I made detailed notes and thought of ways I could frame a talk around it.  After all, this was good information and people needed to know about it!  And being the joyful enthusiast that I am, I was ready to take out my mega phone and tell it from the roof tops!  That is until this happened....

  

Less than ten minutes after I heard this profound piece of prophetic outcry (hear my sarcasm), our Bible study transitioned into small group discussions, at which point my friend shared her recent story of recovery.  I listened as she told us how she spent the holiday season sick, dealing with an injury that will probably change the way she lives, how most of her recovery was spent at home, by herself, with just her husband caring for her and very few other friends.  She daily asked God for a visitor.  Plenty of people saw her at church here and there, and gave her the platitude of prayer.  I was one of them.  After all, that’s what we do when we see someone in need, we “pray”.  Rarely do we visit.  Now mind you, this woman is remarkably enjoyable. A visit would have been delightful, I'm sure.  But there we sat...we saw that she was sick and nobody looked after her.  Nobody showed up.

If this was an isolated incident I would treat it as such and move forward.  But I can’t.  I can’t because it’s for too prevalent in our western culture to ignore.  It’s far too prevalent in me.  We read scripture and know that the marker for being God's child - His disciple - is the manner in which we love others. To which we give a hearty, “Amen!”  Sadly, I am afraid we may like the idea of loving more than its reality.  I know I do. And ye...

I would be remiss in ignoring those who are wonderfully compassionate in our midst... who model well how to love our neighbor in need.  You are the champions of this cause, and we would all do better to take notice of your life.  You would be wonderful mentors for those of us who are often inept at knowing how to stop and be attentive.  Don't hesitate to alert us.  Be patient as we learn to open our eyes and act accordingly.  Many of us are beginners, in need of a gracious tutorial  

Loving others is hard work.  It disrupts our busy lives, takes us out of our comfort zones, and often requires us to set aside the things we consider important.  It's easy to get distracted, forgetting about the need next door.  We get lost in the bright shiny objects of virtual internet worlds and real-life demands.  The sad truth is, I stink at loving others when they are in need.  I just do.... But it’s a pretty big deal to Jesus.  

The forgotten and marginalized are not only those we encounter at a soup kitchen - where we can keep a tidy distance; nor are they merely the ones waiting for a well to be dug somewhere in South Africa.  Those are legitimate needs that must be addressed, but often the forgotten are the people sitting just three seats down from us in the pew on Sunday morning.  They are the ones to whom we wave goodbye while we are on our way to Sunday brunch.  Their stories are shared on the prayer chain, and sometimes over coffee, Tuesday mornings. 

I was stopped short when I listened to my friend.  I see her every Thursday morning, most Wednesday nights, and twice a month on Mondays.  Ironically the Monday night gathering is intended for those who want to be intentional about learning to love like Christ...clearly we have room to grow.  At least I do! 

I guess the first few steps are defining reality, owning it, and coming before God to be changed. I don't know about you, but I want to love better.  I want to be different than I am now, and I am grateful for my friend's honesty because she brought to light what is most real.  Am I willing to be inconvenienced by love?  Am I willing to let my life pause long enough to enter someone else's?  Do I really want God's life of love?  

  

Who is nearby in your life?  Who is it that God is inviting you love, really LOVE? 

More on this next time…

            Receiving our inheritance 

            How do we break out of our pace and learn how to love.

Arise!

“You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy,” - psalm 30:11

Since I am a preacher's wife, rarely is there a Sunday when I skip church.  Not because I'm so incredibly spiritual, but because...well... where else would I go? ...(and some of my reasons and thoughts are found in the Saturday's post titled "I Went To Church Today")  Over the years I've listened to various preachers, but most of the time it's been my husband. And believe it or not, even though we may have discussed the sermon ahead of time during the week, I often find something new, something fresh that the Holy Spirit might want to cultivate in me after the sermon is heard on Sunday.  Last Sunday was no exception.  Only this time the message - and my consequent "ah-ha!" moment - came from our new youth pastor.  Pastor Dan picked the passage in John 11 where Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead - Not your typical after-Christmas “sermon package” but timely to say the least.

I’ve read that passages a few times and over the years I’ve noticed things in the story.  Things like, Jesus raising someone from the dead (Yeah, that's kind of a big deal.)  Or how Mary and Martha were so very grief-stricken and how Jesus cried too.  I’ve wondered why Jesus seemed in no hurry to get to Lazarus.  But this time as we read that passage in church I noticed something new.  Jesus called Lazarus forth out of the tomb and said, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.” 

I guess it would seem an obvious instruction, considering Lazarus had been dead for 4 days and now he wasn't.  He was alive and grave clothes were not only smelly, they were inappropriate for someone living.  The bandages kept his hands and feet bound and covered his face.  He could not move and he couldn't see, nor could he eat or speak with these bandages.

Covered eyes, bound hands and feet are appropriate for the grave.  Tombs are remarkably silent and the dead require no nourishment. And that’s where the connection was made.  The grave…the clothes…the feast-less silence.  In a moment of honest, personal disclosure, I had to admit this muted soul of mine felt dead and was feasting no longer on Christ.  I had grown accustom to the "grave".  Sipping on Christ's life as if it was a limited resource.  Loss, disappointment, confusion, and a journey of surrender had led to a personal grave site.  Frankly, for a season that tomb was necessary, I needed it while my little life became entrusted to his, while my soul was learning to set down the boxing gloves, stop running, and fast from lesser loves.   These are the things we will learn for a lifetime.  But the solemn nature of the grave can become too familiar, and we forget how to live. 

This Christmas, as I set the babe in the little manger scene on our piano, God was birthing something new in me.  Its glimmers had been showing up here and there but not quite discernible.  As pastor Dan read the passage, and the phrase resonated inside,”take off the grave clothes and let [her] go.”, something clarified. The sermon muffled while I surrendered to my thoughts.  “Am I still wearing ‘spiritual grave clothes’”?  I wondered.  “Have I received God’s gift of life but somehow the bandages have remained?”

What good is the gift of HIS life if it remains clothed in the tomb?  The words of Jesus echoed in my thoughts, bouncing off the stone walls of my heart, traveling deep within - to the dead places. Like an alarm they sounded, “Wake up! Come forth!” I could almost hear God audibly speaking, “Stop living among the dead. Arise!  Let the bandages fall.  The days of mourning are being set aside.  Step into my glorious promise – my light-life – and live!”

The exhortation fell like a spring rain, washing away the muddy winter. And in that moment, within the silent forgotten places of me, my soul was shedding grave clothes.  The weight of sorrow was falling off.  Hands that had forgotten how to reach were reaching again, daring to ask God for his good pleasure and favor.  Feet that had long planted themselves within the dirge, danced …just a bit.  And eyes that were accustom to tones of grey saw the faint whisper of color off in the distance.

 So I am returning to songs of joy for worship (sometimes).  When asked how it's going, I am lifting my head, ready to share the promise rather that the pain.  There was a season to share the pain, and sometimes that story is still important, but grief is not an unending pit.  It has a bottom.  Christ is there and He shares the grave with us for a moment.  Then He calls us forth to new life, new stories, where our sorrow is not forgotten - just redeemed.

It would be dishonest to say, just like that, my soul awakened and came fully alive - that there are no signs of grave clothes anywhere.  That simply is not true.  We are all in process, moving from death to life, and “Saturday” takes time...but perhaps this story rings true and you find yourself in the dirge,  stuck, weighed down with the clothing of the tomb and a new you, the alive-in-Christ-you, is being invited to come forth, take off the grave clothes,... and live.  

Stoking the Fire

"The fire on the altar must be kept burning; it must not go out. Every morning the priest is to add firewood and arrange the burnt offering on the fire and burn the fat of the fellowship offerings on it. The fire must be kept burning on the altar continuously; it must not go out."    Leviticus 6: 12-13

A friend of mine shared this passage through something she recently wrote.  It’s not really about Christmas at first glance.  It’s about the Temple rituals God established early on with his people.   The rituals were rather specific and unless one takes a close contextual look, they can seem pretty random as well.  None the less, they were for His people – a people waiting on God.  A wandering people who were hungry and thirsty (Ps 107).

I guess that’s where the connection comes.  In the waiting. In the preparation and in the hunger and thirst…in the advent.

I don’t know about you but I find myself a little burnt out and soul-thirsty in the flurry of activity this time of year.  By the time I get up in the morning and walk down the hall to the kitchen for a cup of tea, I have a “to-do” list a mile long running through my head!  It’s hard to pause even for a moment, and sometimes I'm tired before the day begins.

But this passage in Leviticus stops me up short.  This specific instruction was for the priest.   Every morning add firewood... arrange the offering on the fire….keep the fire lit...don't let the fire go out.  The fire had to stay lit.  which meant stoking it - arranging the wood.  The temple rituals were intended to offer God’s people a picture of God’s ongoing redemptive work and point them in the direction of Christ.  In this particular instance it is the fellowship- or PEACE - offering that is being burnt.

The funny thing about rituals or traditions is that when we encounter them they seem to be able to cut through the noise of daily activity and redirect our thoughts, which will often redirect our heart.  While my pace might make it difficult to pause, the ritual (or routine) of pausing is necessary.  In it, Christ, the great high priest, can come and stoke his inward fire in me.  Things that have fallen out of order can be rearranged and set right internally.  I guess it's just easier to keep the main thing the main thing when I pause and silence myself before God; which makes a person more ready for the flurry...more able to encounter it and respond well.  

And there again, my mind wanders.  This time to the parable of the ten virgins and I recall the one whose oil ran out.  She hurried off to refuel but it was too late.   And I wonder, am I that girl?  Do I join the group and move along with the crowd, having little regard of the needed fuel for the journey?  Or Do I return to the place of quiet sacrifice, lay down what seems most dear in the moment - albeit time, finances, relationships, desires - and become present with Christ, allowing him to reorder my inward world through the fellowship of His presence in the word.

 Lord, I want to live in such a way to encounter the living Christ?  Oh help me stop and be still before you.  Quicken my mind to even think of it! And by your grace, give me the decisive strength to do it.  Let me find you in the pause and encounter your peace.